10.04.2003 | 6:09 pm

It has been an age since I have written a meaningful entry. Many things have been flying in my face lately and I just haven�t had the mental fortitude to put words on computer. About every other day I think I won�t be able to make another school day. I haven�t yet learned to scale down my activity enough so that I don�t just drop dead at the end of every day. Most days my whole right leg, not just the knee, hurts to the point of keeping me awake at night. I have to take some pretty strong pain killers to get things to stop throbbing so I can even sleep. One trouble with prescription strength pain killers is that a person wakes up with a headache and grogginess in the morning. I am not a coffee drinker, so it takes about three hours to work out the kinks in my system and start functioning normally. I went through this same routine before I had my hip replaced 5 years ago. By the time the end of school rolled around, I was practically running to the hospital to get the surgery taken care of, to try to get back to some sort of normal life. I was dismayed at the pain and discomfort I had to experience before I reached that �normal� goal.

I am beginning to mentally �pack my suitcase� for my trip to Pennsylvania. I will be there a week from today. Life in PA is so cold compared to AZ. We are still in the high 90�s and PA is having an early cool-down. I dug out all my long sleeved shirts, Levis and sweaters this morning to get them ironed and packed. In between working on my clothes and packing I must SIT DOWN.> During sit down time I am correcting a mountain of papers and journals from the little squirrels, in order to get report cards done. I think I ran into something strange in a journal that I must talk to a parent about. This child keeps quoting something that I think he has heard on a raunchy �call line.� That is the only place I can think where he could have heard it in order to write it in his journal. UGH.. this is second grade folks! This particular child has been very moody and tearful lately too. Then there are a few boys that want to draw monsters and dragons in their journals instead of writing. I think I need to monitor everyone a little closer. Another time to be back on my feet�which means tired leg and knee�which means �PAIN! What a discouraging downward spiral!

Last night and today I received two phone calls from nephews, wanting phone numbers of other, newly married nephews. I was at a loss. This afternoon I have been compiling a directory of just my own children�s addresses, phone numbers, work numbers, cell numbers, and e-mail addresses. I am sending those out to my four siblings with instructions to add all their own children�s information to the list. I hope I can compile a current directory of my side of the family so we can all stay in touch or, if necessary, use for emergencies. I�ll let hubby do his side, and we can do the same thing with them. When we get everything complete it should be quite a long list.

Today was also what we in �Mormon� country call General Conference. Instead of attending regular church meetings on Sunday, we listen to meetings broadcast from Salt Lake City. The President and Prophet of the church, along with other leaders give very good talks prepared for the world-wide church to hear and learn from. I was not surprised that today the focus was so much on avoiding pornography and immoral music, movies and TV shows. They can really poison the soul and destroy families. I have a very good friend whose husband got sucked into internet porn. He lost his job, his family and just this spring, his wife. (my friend Donna) I�ll call him �Mike� finally acted out a real fantasy with a live person. Before that time, Donna had stuck with him�trying to give him every chance to repent, change, and pull himself out of his addiction to pornography. He refused to go to counseling and just couldn�t do it. When his thoughts and ideas turned into actions, she had to say �enough!� �I won�t have this in the home or worry about it any more.� She is relieved that she finally made the decision, but so very, very sad that her family has been torn asunder but this evil, malicious cancer. It doesn�t surprise me that men of God are warning us to do everything within our power to keep it out of our homes.

When I get to Pennsylvania, the little girls are going to sing me a program of �Annie� songs. That should brighten up my outlook.

Catsnapples~ in 2nd grade and at life

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